Pathetic, but I'm so proud!

My husband didn't believe I would blog about this, and I may regret this someday, but I just had to share my joy. Any infertile would totally understand.

I had to go to the Dr for an Ultrasound Follicle check today to see if the higher dosage of Femara was working. I really did not have high hopes. I actually almost canceled the Ultrasound because I was so sure it had not worked. So imagine my joy when the Dr found a follicle... a perfect sized follicle at that! In fact, the Dr was so impressed he congratulated me on producing such a nice follicle.

He showed me the follicle on the ultrasound screen and measured it and everything. As sad as it may sound, I looked at that little follicle with instant affection. (I imagine the same way a new mother looks at the little blob of their growing child in the ultrasound images; Although I am willing to bet it is even more exciting in that case.) I looked at that cute little follicle and felt love, and hope, and renewed faith. Finally we had found a medication and gotten the dosage right to make me produce good follicles and to ovulate. It may be a small step in the grand scheme of things... but it's a step, and I am happy and very relieved.

I was so excited that I had to tell someone... and that someone turned into a lot of someones. My first thought was to call my mom, but that's not possible, so I called Jenny, which was a good call because her giddiness matched my own. I then called Linda and our dialog went as follows:
Me: Hey are you busy, because I have to share my good news with you.
Linda: You're pregnant??
Me: No, but I'm one step closer!!
Then came the whole explanation and the congratulations. I also sent out one big text message to lots of people. I just couldn't contain myself. Heck, I even called my dad and told him all about (which I am sure was pretty embarrassing for him).

I was super excited to tell Mike... and I am convinced his joy would have matched mine had he not been shuffling thru prescription and lab slips from the Dr office and happened across the one written out for him to do a Semen Analysis.

So now that you all think I'm crazy (except for all the other infertiles reading this), I must add a comment in my defense, and something I pointed out to Mike. As crazy as it sounds that I have so much affection for a follicle.... that follicle could very well be the start of our child. So I guess only time will tell!